There are so many things that I can sit here and write about if my mind would slow down and allow me a moment to make sense of everything. I am unable at times to get a clear enough thought, even to focus long enough to place it down on paper before the following six ideas start to yell at me.
My mind racing makes it so frustrating, and it honestly shuts me down from expressing myself. I have so much knowledge and information to give, but I am my own worse enemy. How can I give anyone what I have if I cannot make sense of it myself long enough to articulate it?
My inability to stop my mind from racing has always been the biggest frustration in the past. Since I started this journey, it has been an enormous pain to work around or work along.
I can write down a list of ideas or, in my case, start some of my stories just so that I won’t forget the main idea and leave them started. I was writing an idea alone on a list, but it wasn’t enough at times, making it difficult to complete that idea. With anything else that I have learned via trial and error, I realized that leaving half-started blogs/stories allows me to go back and finish with a little more ease.
The only downside of this method is that I am an emotional person, and on a rare occasion, I visit the same emotion twice. Not feeling the same feeling twice can make it challenging to finish with the same sentiment. Something simple can change the message or lesson I am trying to get across.
I haven’t stopped myself from doing what I want to get done. It just makes it a lot more difficult for me to accomplish. I wish the task would be a lot simpler, but hey, life is not about how simple it can be but how many challenges you can overcome. Or is that just something I say to myself to feel better hmm?
But anyway, back to the task at hand, I have a lot of content that I started. It is still waiting for me to provide it with an ending finally. I am just waiting for my life to allow me the opportunity to do so. I mean, I understand that all I have is time on my hands. The problem is that my hands are extremely busy with all of the mental health patients in my household.
What is a girl to do? I love being the best mom I can be, I also love helping others as best as possible, but sometimes I have to choose between those two. Then do not forget that I still need to remember myself and my needs mentally.
Sometimes my children can be my biggest trigger when I am helping others. Then there have been some occasions when assisting others to have caused me to become emotionally drained, leaving nothing for my family or self.
How can I go back to an emotion that originated from all of that madness? To complete a task, article, blog, job, etc., that needed that emotion, I have to find ways to blend in a current situation. It is imperative that the past feeling combines well with the new one so the task can make sense and assist those that need it.
A lot goes into being just me, so imagine adding three lives into the mix. Then I am taking it upon myself to add the lives of those we care about and the extended family we are trying to build with our social media family that may need our support/guidance.
I am doing all this with these thoughts and emotions always racing even when sleeping, sick, with a migraine. It doesn’t matter what I have going on. My mind will always seem to go even with my medicine unless I smoke some natural Mary Jane who yells at my brain and tells it to shut up.
I am not sure if I am the only person that seems to have this problem. If so, then oh well, and if not, then “hey, my name is Linette, and it is a pleasure to meet, you lol.”
Don’t forget to stop by and check out the family on our YouTube channel if you get a chance https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCD8cJIfkpnExknhPQcjShnA. I can’t wait to catch you over there. Have a great day, and remember we got this!
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